Feed it to the Pigs

Mom, Buck and I were in the car on 93 North after visiting Patrick & Jessica and their five children. Mom felt uplifted by all the love poured on her by those precious great grandchildren. My cell phone rang. Elliot cardiology calling. Mom's second Holter monitor had registered only six hours.

"That's odd. She said she took it off when she got up. It should've been on for at least 20 hours," I said. I turned to face Mom in the back seat and confirmed once again that she had kept it on until 7:00 am. She confirmed that.

The nurse said she would check with the doctor to see if he wanted to schedule another testing and call back.

"I hate wearing that damn thing! There's nothing wrong with my heart anyway," she said.

I quizzed her a little further about when she took it off because it didn't make sense that it had only recorded six hours. "Did you accidentally unhook one of the wires, do you think?"

"No. But I did unhook it to take my bra off when I went to bed, but I hooked it right back up."

"MOM, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DISCONNECT IT!"

"Hey, don't scream at her," said Buck. "Calm down!"

"Why not?" she asked.

"Because you have to leave it on for 24 hours, that's why. You're supposed to sleep with your bra on."

"I can't sleep with my bra on. I took it off the first time I had the monitor."

"No you didn't. They told you specifically that you would have to sleep with it on," I said.

She didn't believe me. Denied it up and down. Claimed she never has slept with her bra on when, in fact, she slept several nights in her bra after breaking her wrist in June. It had been too painful to try to get it off.

"Well, they might want to repeat the test," I said.

"I don't know why. There's nothing wrong with my heart."

"They did discover one area of blockage that might have caused you to faint."

She continued to insist there was nothing wrong. Then she said, "I wish they would just cut it out and feed it to the pigs!"